November 25, 2007

I hate you

We reached a new milestone this evening. For the first time, my six year-old daughter spoke the words "I hate you" to her mother.

They had been at each other all evening long. My wife was telling my daughter to clean up the mess she made with her toys. My daughter was finding every excuse in the world not to do it, including just saying "No."

All evening long, the steam built up slowly by slowly in my wife, until she could take no more. And then finally, she exploded. I don't know exactly what happened. I was in the bathroom at the time, but I heard lots and lots of yelling come out of my wife. Then I heard my daughter run up the stairs and state very clearly "I hate you" to her mother.

I think this is the first time she has said that out loud.

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November 16, 2007

You HAVE to do that.

This afternoon as I was preparing to go away for the weekend, my wife encountered me with several things that she expected me to do before I left. She knew I would be away since the beginning of the week but didn't say a thing until I was already supposed to be out the door.

Every time I asked her for help with something, her answer was a flat out "no." Yet, she had no problems just expecting me to complete a laundry list of chores that she just didn't want to do herself.

I did my best to get as much done as I could, but then I really had to go. That's when my wife pulled out a new trick. She informed me that If I didn't do everything she said before I left, she wouldn't take her medicine this weekend.

I'm kind of stumped by that one. I mean, it's just one more way of controlling me. I don't want her to go off her meds. But if I do what she demands this time, she'll know that she can use that against me again and again.

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November 07, 2007

Abuse apparently doesn't happen in the bathroom.

For the past two days, my wife has been in ultra-low energy mode. The most movement she made was between bed, the recliner, and the bathroom. Other than that, she's been sleeping or watching T.V. for the past two days.

Last night, when it was time for my daughter to take a bath, my wife insisted that I go up and wash my daughter's hair. That made me mad. After all the times that she has insisted that I'm some kind of abuser and therefore can't be left alone with my daughter, now it's all of a sudden ok for me to be in the bathroom with her while she's taking a bath.

It just underlines the issue in my mind. My wife isn't really afraid that I'm some kind of abuser. It's just the power trip that she has over me. Any time she wants to throw a wrench in the works, this is just one more weapon in her arsenal.

Posted by ehdonhon at 09:34 AM | Comments (0) | TrackBack

November 05, 2007

I want the nice mommy back.

I was away this weekend, and apparently things didn't go so well at home. My wife and daughter we at each other all weekend long. My wife reports that one of the things that my daughter told her over the weekend was "I miss you. I want the nice mommy back.".

I told my wife that I could identify with that feeling. Which immediately got my wife angry with me. After that, today has been a rotten day. My wife is doing everything she can to make everybody as unhappy as she is. She even went as far as canceling the camping trip the three of us had planned for this upcoming weekend, which has just totally devastated my daughter.

My wife claims that we can't go now because she has to go to church instead. Which would be ok, except that they don't exactly change when church happens, so she knew this would conflict with church when she agreed to the trip months ago. Also, she hasn't been to church in months, which makes her excuse somewhat dubious.

Additionally, when I told her that she could go to church and just my daughter and I would go to camp without her, she pulled out the child abuser card and started insisting that I had absolutely no right to take her up there without her and that she "doesn't trust me" and she "won't allow it."

So, it's been a miserable day.

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